Camille’s son Bob rolls out the latex in the living room:
Chaos Theory
I think the most difficult part of this adventure is trying to complete repairs amidst complete chaos. Neither the shop nor man’s land are up, so I am continually rummaging through boxes looking for notes, tools, hardware, jigs, fixtures, shims, ouija board, gunpowder, liquor.
Here, I’m bringing new cedar deck planking into the garage to dry before coating with stain:
There are about a dozen boards that need immediate replacement on our deck:
Iconoclasm
Camille used the master bath shower for the first time last night, and the faucet handle fell apart in her hand. She told me she out it back together, and she was worried she had cross-threaded it.
It was indeed cross-threaded, but not by her. Someone else had tried to force it on, so I had to recreate the threads with a file and remount it in the right direction (it was also on upside down).
The shower head was also leaking from several places, so I replaced the shower head. In the instructions, in bold print: “DO NOT USE TEFLON TAPE.”
I mounted the new head, and turned it on. Hmmm. A trickle from the top near the threads. I went out to the garage, got my teflon tape. I wound a layer on the pipe coming out of the wall, remounted the head, and voila! NO LEAK.
And people wonder why I am disinclined to follow instructions.
Interview
I applied for a position at the Snohomish County Assessor’s office, and I passed the written exam last week.
They selected the top five or six candidates for interviews, and mine was this morning at 9:30. There was a panel of four interviewers, and I was provided with the list of questions they would ask 15 minutes before the interview.
I think that was a great move on their part. It probably saves a lot of their time, eliminating waiting for candidates who are squirming, hemming and hawing, and fumbling for answers. OK, so I still squirmed, hemmed and hawed, and fumbled for answers, but at least I got the “deer in the headlights” look under control. I think…
This is the first formal interview I have had in 13 years – the last one was for Qwest Communications when we came to Seattle in 2000. In that case, I later found out that the only reason the interviewer wanted to interview me in person was because she wanted to see the guy who was moving across the country for love.
This morning, I didn’t feel on top of my game, and I came away feeling like I was too vague or mealy mouthed in my responses. I guess that is just the way it is with open-ended questions – I never know how far to back up, or how much data to include.
“Tell us how you got into appraising.”
“Ummm, well… First, Adam met Eve, and, uh…” Oh, no, wait. Maybe that’s too much information…
Next
I didn’t have to wonder very long. (Flat tired.)
Washing Machine Repair
Next up on the big disaster wheel, the washing machine failed.
We called a repairman, who pulled out the filter, in which there was six socks, steel underwires from two different bras, four bobby pins, some small pieces of cheap jewelry, a nail, a lot of unidentifiable schmutz, an unopened package of string cheese, and 46 cents.
Now that all of that has been removed, the washer works much, much better!
I wonder what will fail next.
Slide Puzzle
Remember those little number slide puzzles we had as kids?
Well, here’s the grown up version:
Eventually, this will be the new “man’s land.”
Sprite Relocated
The afternoon sun spills across my Biltmore Sprite, now installed in our new front yard!
Surprise
Things are falling apart faster than I can repair them.
Late last night, I unloaded a small grouping of Camille’s clothes from my truck onto the rack in the laundry room, then turned to take the garbage bins to the curb.
Behind me, I heard a CRASH!!!!
The entire clothes rack tore out of the wall.
Camille and I are both shocked at the filth – people were actually living here – and the damage that was hidden by careful placement of furniture.
After six straight days of sunup to sundown work, we are only three days away from the moving truck, with miles to go before we can sleep.
Jeff Says: I think you overloaded the shelf with Charmin… 😀
Oinky Doinky Doo
HOW do people get this much schmutz on all of the light switch plates in the house?
It was caked and thoroughly dried on. The only thing that would get rid of it was… TAH DAHHHH!! Scrubbing Bubbles!
Apparently, the air in this house had been full of grease, because all of the central air registers were actually furry with dust stuck in a gummy coating. Like the old “tar and feather” treatment. Thankfully, we have a utility sink, and lots of hot water!
Inaugurated
I spilled a little blood in the kitchen today, so the Mill Creek house is officially inaugurated!
There is something primal and manly about bleeding all over your work. 😀
I’m feeling overwhelmed. As I walk through the place, I see more and more things that need attention. I can see my “honey do” list stretching into years, into infinity. Things are literally falling apart as I touch them. I really don’t know how the sellers managed to keep so many things precariously balanced while we did the walk through, but they did.
Now, the dishwasher cannot be opened without removing tiles from the counter top (it opened fine on inspection day for the Home Inspector), and underneath – VOILA! – advanced dryrot.
The cabinet hinges below the sink were so corroded that one of the doors fell off in Camile’s hand. Apparently, the previous owners slopped so much water down the front of the cabinets, for such an extended period of time, that the nickel plated steel hinges corroded into complete collapse.
I’m not worried – I know how to fix everything that is wrong, I’m just concerned about the amount of time it will take to stomp all of these ants.
Leaning Into The Turns
Tomorrow is closing day! The past few weeks have been a tornado of planning and activity, and the next two will be even worse. I’ve been wandering around a little shell-shocked, with a clipboard as constant companion.
Oddly, under the pressure of an external schedule, I have managed to complete dozens of small tasks that I had been putting off for months. Such as adjusting the striker plates on the front door so that the door closes tightly against the weather stripping. I feel slightly ridiculous about this, because in each completion lurks an awareness, “That wasn’t so bad. Why the hell didn’t I just do this already?” Motivation is a curious beast.
Of course, it also feels a little silly to have finally made so many changes that make this house more comfortable and enjoyable to live in, all within nine months of leaving it. But, to quote Rummy, “you go to war with the Army that you have. Not the army you might want or wish to have at a later time.” Or as my friend Kris so eloquently says, “Meh.”
One Towel Only, Please
Here’s a 4-minute TEDx talk that demonstrates the correct method for drying your hands with a single paper towel.
Jigs and Fixtures
I make a fair amount of jigs and fixtures in order to provide a higher degree of precision in woodworking. This image shows the construction of a jig that will hold crown molding stock on my chop saw so that I can make very precise miter cuts.
The beauty of using these kinds of guides is not just precision, but also repeatability. The eighth cut will be exactly the same as the first. Or the twenty-third.
The cuts I am making with this jig will be center stage in the kitchen for years to come, so I want them to be perfect.
Details
Silly as it may seem, the place where the Hickory meets the Travertine is a point of pride for me. Divinity is in the details, and this is the place two projects meet, and are perfectly flushed and mated.
